"You Owe Me Nothing in Return"

Alanis Morissette's song "You Owe Me Nothing in Return" effectively summarises how I understand love in a relationship ought to be. It describes an unselfish version of love -- "the only kind of love as I understand it that there really is." Unfortunately there are so few people mature enough, and secure enough, to understand and want such a love and a relationship based on such a love. It requires complete trust of and faith in your partner. It also requires self-assurance. There is no room for self-pity and insisting in your partner fulfilling your selfish needs.

I hope to one day find a person to share a relationship based on such an understanding of love. And I hope that when I find that person that I will have grown adequately to present my partner with this type of love in return.



"You Owe Me Nothing In Return"

I'll give you countless amounts of outright acceptance if you want it
I will give you encouragement to choose the path that you want if you need it
You can speak of anger and doubts your fears and freak outs and I'll hold it
You can share your so-called shame filled accounts of times in your life and I won't judge it
(and there are no strings attached to it)

You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give
You owe me nothing for caring the way that I have
I give you thanks for receiving it's my privilege
And you owe me nothing in return

You can ask for space for yourself and only yourself and I'll grant it
You can ask for freedom as well or time to travel and you'll have it
You can ask to live by yourself or love someone else and I'll support it
You can ask for anything you want anything at all and I'll understand it
(and there are no strings attached to it)

You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give
You owe me nothing for caring the way that I have
I give you thanks for receiving it's my privilege
And you owe me nothing in return

I bet you're wondering when the next payback shoe will eventually drop
I bet you're wondering when my conditional police will force you to cough up
I bet you wonder how far you have now danced you way back into debt
This is the only kind of love as I understand it that there really is

You can express your deepest of truths even if it means I'll lose you and I'll hear it
You can fall into the abyss on your way to your bliss I'll empathize with
You can say that you have to skip town to chase your passion and I'll hear it
You can even hit rock bottom have a mid-life crisis and I'll hold it
(and there are no strings attached)

You owe me nothing for giving the love that I give
You owe me nothing for caring the way that I have
I give you thanks for receiving it's my privilege
And you owe me nothing in return