Home baked bread with melted dark chocolate.
Sunday, 16 June 2013
Saturday, 15 June 2013
Wednesday, 5 June 2013
Kim Kwan Seok
Een van Suid-Korea se bekendste musikante is Kim Kwang Seok. Wat Johannes Kerkorrel vir ons was, is wat Kim Kwang Seok vir Korea was. Min mense weet regtig watse effek Johannes Kerkorrel op die Afrikaanse musiekbedryf gehad het, soortgelyk dink ek nie die jonger geslag Suid-Koreaners besef hoedat Kim Kwang Seok 'n ruimte geskep het vir die Koreaanse indie-sektor nie. Kleiner, intieme konserte soos wat tans in die Daehangro in Seoul beleef word is grootliks weens sy invloed. (Die alternatief is daardie ondraaglike monsteragtige K-Pop konserte met oorverdowende klank en verblindende ligte en sintetiese klanke.) Soortgelyk aan Kerkorrel het Kim ook selfmoord gepleeg deur homself te hang. Dit was 1996. Hy was slegs 32 jaar oud.
Kim Kwang Seok se balades is emosie belaai in die volk-rock / indie-rock genre en 'n mens kan maklik die musiek "voel", al verstaan jy nie die woorde nie. Nietemin, onderaan is een van Kim Kwang Seok se songs met onderskrifte.
Hier is 'n skakel na 'n aanhanger-webblad vir Kim Kwon Seok.
Kim Kwang Seok se balades is emosie belaai in die volk-rock / indie-rock genre en 'n mens kan maklik die musiek "voel", al verstaan jy nie die woorde nie. Nietemin, onderaan is een van Kim Kwang Seok se songs met onderskrifte.
Hier is 'n skakel na 'n aanhanger-webblad vir Kim Kwon Seok.
Saturday, 1 June 2013
A Lesson on Love
Today I learned that one can end a relationship not because you love someone too little, but because you love them too much.
It is one of the most interesting life lessons I have learned so far.
Monday, 27 May 2013
Theme Songs
Below is "Don't Do Sadness" from the Spring Awakening musical -- my favourite.
I don't know if you are anything like me, in that you have "theme songs" that typify certain periods of your life, certain sections of a year, certain mental and / or emotional states. I do. Certain songs become stuck with me and I will listen to them over and over again as they somehow capture my emotional gestalt at a given moment.
At the moment, I feel that "Don't Do Sadness" (what an awesome song!) is lining itself up as my next theme song. My subconscious is predicting sadness (I might talk about it in a future post), and so it is gearing me up to get into the right frame of mind, one that do not do sadness.
I don't know if you are anything like me, in that you have "theme songs" that typify certain periods of your life, certain sections of a year, certain mental and / or emotional states. I do. Certain songs become stuck with me and I will listen to them over and over again as they somehow capture my emotional gestalt at a given moment.
At the moment, I feel that "Don't Do Sadness" (what an awesome song!) is lining itself up as my next theme song. My subconscious is predicting sadness (I might talk about it in a future post), and so it is gearing me up to get into the right frame of mind, one that do not do sadness.
Wednesday, 22 May 2013
Next Semester's Classes
- Creative Writing [Senior students]
- British & American Literary Criticism II (Contemporary Ideas) [Senior students]
- English Presentation (Public Speaking) [Junior students]
- Basic English Sentence Writing [Freshmen]
- Basic Animation English [Freshmen]
The first three on this list I was also assigned last year, but the Literary Criticism class had few students so I gave it up and instead got assigned Advanced English Grammar, which I didn't care for much, especially because the textbook I was asked to use was terrible. Next semester we will try the Literary Criticism class again. The department chairperson is quite keen on this class, as am I, but students are less excited and since this is an elective class there really is no guarantee as to the number of students that will take it. If less than seven students enroll for it, it will be cancelled and I will teach only four modules. This may or may not be a good thing. It may be good in that it will free me up a bit, which is good as far as my personal studying goes--the PhD is taking quite a toll. But it is bad in that I won't be paid the overtime I am currently paid whenever I teach more than four modules.
The two new classes which I will be teaching are both freshmen classes: Basic English Sentence Writing and Basic Animation English. As for the first, I chose the textbook for our department, so I guess it is only fair that I sample my own medicine, so to speak. It will be an easy class to teach (I know, because I chose a comprehensive textbook, which basically teaches itself). As for the other class, Basic Animation English, I really have no idea what the purpose of that class is. I'm assuming that it is some kind of language skills course--possibly, listening comprehension--using animated films. I haven't had the opportunity to look at last year's syllabus yet. Honestly, I think it is a peculiar class to have in an English department.
I won't be teaching 19th & 20th Century American Poetry next semester, something I am a little sad about. We have a new American faculty member who--being American--can possibly bring a more native perspective to the subject matter. While I am sad about not teaching it, it is a time consuming class to prepare for and grading essays also take a lot of time. The Literary Criticism class will take up enough of my time, so that I'm not overly sentimental about the poetry class. I also hope to refine my Creative Writing course and actually have in mind a textbook of sorts, focused on the creation and representation of characters. I can use this class as motivation to work on that.
This week is the 13th week of our 16-week semester. After the 16th week I just need to grade exam papers and then stick around for an extra week of admin, where after I'll have vacation. Looking forward to a well-deserved break!
Friday, 10 May 2013
"You only talk about the material"
"Professor," laments my student today, "you only talk about the material. Other professors sometimes talk about social events or personal things, but you only talk about our class work."
And here I was, thinking that I have been slacking off a little bit and should in fact refocus so that I can get my students their money's worth --- but it seems that is not what they want after all. What they want is a teacher that shares personal stories and make social musings about the latest Hollywood gossip or other unrelated topics.
It is untrue that I never share personal anecdotes as this student who is in two of my classes well know. I share much of myself with them, but only in so far as it is relevant to the subject material. But that is the point, isn't it. They don't want to be bothered with the subject material.
As the student continued: "I know it is good for us [that you always focus on the material], but sometimes we are tired and don't want to think too hard." Well, I feel tired too and would sometimes love to just sit back and talk about the weather or the latest movies in the cinemas. But that's not what I get paid to do. I'm curious how the contracts of other professors in my department read. Maybe they have a clause that says that we can sometimes talk about the weather and the latest movies in the cinemas.
And here I was, thinking that I have been slacking off a little bit and should in fact refocus so that I can get my students their money's worth --- but it seems that is not what they want after all. What they want is a teacher that shares personal stories and make social musings about the latest Hollywood gossip or other unrelated topics.
It is untrue that I never share personal anecdotes as this student who is in two of my classes well know. I share much of myself with them, but only in so far as it is relevant to the subject material. But that is the point, isn't it. They don't want to be bothered with the subject material.
As the student continued: "I know it is good for us [that you always focus on the material], but sometimes we are tired and don't want to think too hard." Well, I feel tired too and would sometimes love to just sit back and talk about the weather or the latest movies in the cinemas. But that's not what I get paid to do. I'm curious how the contracts of other professors in my department read. Maybe they have a clause that says that we can sometimes talk about the weather and the latest movies in the cinemas.
Saturday, 4 May 2013
Black Tulip
I live at a very nature-rich place, with flowers blooming wonderfully this time of year. Everywhere it is green again, with splashes of bright floral colours. There are many flowers that grow here; I particularly love the daffodils and tulips. Beside the path towards my apartment I saw this exquisite dark-maroon tulip, so dark it looks nearly black. I feel very blessed to experience such beauty.
A Dream about Misfits and Bullies
 |
| Image Source |
I had a weird dream. Or should I just say that I dreamt, since all my dreams tend to be weird—I can't remember if I ever had a dream that was not somehow, somewhat abnormal.
In any case, with some fillers for it to make sense, here is what I dreamed:
I am somewhere in a public bathroom standing in front of a urinal and doing the things one do in front of urinals when about four or five boys, anything from twelve to sixteen years of age, enters and starts knocking on the door of one of the occupied toilet stalls. They obviously know who is in there—another boy—and calls him names, telling him to open the door and come out. Some of the boys even climb onto the partition and look over into the toilet stall, saying things like “the faggot is tossing” and the like.
I continue to the basin and start washing my hands, while looking at the action behind me in the reflection of the mirror. The kids seem not to be bothered by my presence. As I shake the water from my hands and start to dry them with some paper towels an adult steps in, at which one boy says excitedly, “Dad, the faggot is in here!” The man, with hair dishevelled and a beer belly, steps to the toilet door and calls to the kid inside, “Open up that door you little faggot!”
To my surprise the door actually clicks open and out steps a nerdy, somewhat goofy looking kid. Because he is a little plump and possibly big for his age it makes it a little difficult to guess his age, but I'd go with about eleven or twelve. “Now show this little faggot what we do to fucks like him,” says the adult, at which point I step forward and says, “So you're the adult coming to solve the kids' problem, are you?”
“Yes,” he answers. “Unless you are someone important who knows people in high places, you better stay out of it.”
“As a matter of fact,” replied I, “I am someone important and know many people in high places.” Even in the dream I had no idea why I considered myself important or who these people in high places are that I referred to, but nonetheless I said it without missing a beat. “Leave the kid alone.”
The guy clearly didn't like my attitude. “Fuck you,” he said, and swung at me, at which I guarded with one arm and stepped to his inside letting his fist pass me, and with my other arm I delivered two very quick elbow strikes to the side of the guys head. As his knees buckled I quickly stepped behind him, wrapped an arm around his neck into a choke-hold and pulled him backward so that he was off-balance.
“Get out,” I said sternly to the kids who started to scramble out off the room; and to the victimised boy I said, “Wait for me. I will walk with you.” I feared that the other kids might jump him outside once he is alone, so I wanted to make sure he got where he needed to get safely.
Then I turned my attention back to the guy I was holding. “Now you listen to me. If I ever hear you mistreat anybody that is somehow different from you, you better sleep very light, because I will find you and when I am finished with you, you will be the different one. Do you get me?” Nearly purple in the face, the guy nodded at which I let him go and he dropped to the floor gagging.
Touching the goofy kid on the shoulder, I led him outside.
That's the dream.
I guess my subconscious harbours some anger towards bullies.
Thursday, 2 May 2013
All things come to those who wait, or nag long enough
Since I started working at my current job I have been complaining about the slowness of my computer. Even though they gave me a new computer at the time (2008), it has been terribly slow. I've complained numerous times, only to hear that my computer is too new to be replaced. From the very started my solution had been to go work at home whenever I needed to really work on a functioning computer. While my home computer is not glitch-free, at least it is fast.
Last year I again complained to the IT-office about my slow computer and again they told me the same thing, the computer is not old enough to be replaced, but what they will do instead is install Windows 7. Imagine this, having an already slow computer and then adding a new operating system to it, designed for newer hardware. Since I thought that maybe the problem was with all the old network settings or whatever they customarily install and tweak for university computers I decided that maybe giving it a good format and re-installing everything afresh might just do the trick. But no, the problem is simply that the computer does not have enough RAM.
Finally this week I was so frustrated that I felt like punching something. I begged the the IT-office, telling them that I am willing to buy memory myself and install it, but I can't continue like this any longer. Surprise-surprise, this morning they came and replaced the 1GB RAM with a 2GB RAM.
Similarly my desk chair has been in a terrible state for months. I have complained about it in November last year already, sending them detailed photographs of the problem. Six months later, and after some more complaining, at last they replaced my chair a few days ago.
The boiler in my apartment has been giving me some problems too. I complained before and they sent out a technician but it didn't help much. Months later and after some more complaining another technician came today. At least this one seem to have found the cause of my boiler erratic behaviour which often causes my lovely, hot and relaxing shower to suddenly turn into a frightening encounter with the icy claws of death. The technician was supposed to return later today to replace some new parts, but he didn't show. So I guess I will have to resume my complaining tomorrow again.
There are more things in need of complaint, but I will do them one at a time. At least some of the things on my checklist are being addressed. Now, if I can only get my department to change those dreadful meetings at 8:30 on Wednesday morning life would indeed be taking a wonderful turn for the better.
Last year I again complained to the IT-office about my slow computer and again they told me the same thing, the computer is not old enough to be replaced, but what they will do instead is install Windows 7. Imagine this, having an already slow computer and then adding a new operating system to it, designed for newer hardware. Since I thought that maybe the problem was with all the old network settings or whatever they customarily install and tweak for university computers I decided that maybe giving it a good format and re-installing everything afresh might just do the trick. But no, the problem is simply that the computer does not have enough RAM.
Finally this week I was so frustrated that I felt like punching something. I begged the the IT-office, telling them that I am willing to buy memory myself and install it, but I can't continue like this any longer. Surprise-surprise, this morning they came and replaced the 1GB RAM with a 2GB RAM.
Similarly my desk chair has been in a terrible state for months. I have complained about it in November last year already, sending them detailed photographs of the problem. Six months later, and after some more complaining, at last they replaced my chair a few days ago.
The boiler in my apartment has been giving me some problems too. I complained before and they sent out a technician but it didn't help much. Months later and after some more complaining another technician came today. At least this one seem to have found the cause of my boiler erratic behaviour which often causes my lovely, hot and relaxing shower to suddenly turn into a frightening encounter with the icy claws of death. The technician was supposed to return later today to replace some new parts, but he didn't show. So I guess I will have to resume my complaining tomorrow again.
There are more things in need of complaint, but I will do them one at a time. At least some of the things on my checklist are being addressed. Now, if I can only get my department to change those dreadful meetings at 8:30 on Wednesday morning life would indeed be taking a wonderful turn for the better.
Saturday, 27 April 2013
Mmm . . .
 |
| James Madison (1751–1836) |
“History records that the money changers have used every form of abuse, intrigue, deceit, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and it's issuance.” ― James Madison
Want to know what is wrong with the world economy? Just listen to James Madison, the fourth president of the United States of the America, and “Father of the Constitution”.
A Confession of Momentary Loneliness -- and the Remedy of Art
Yesterday afternoon after I taught my last class for the week, 19th Century English Poetry--we are currently covering Lord Byron--I was suddenly overcome with loneliness. It is a queer feeling and is a bit like a headache for me, which is another sensation I very seldom experience. And that is the problem with both loneliness and headaches; because I so seldom feel these phenomena, they feel extra acute when I do experience them. I very seldom feel lonely. I'm usually too busy, to be honest. My life is filled with so many things, that there is hardly the time to be lonely. Then, there are also many people in my life. I am richly blessed with friendships, although many of my closest friends are not close at hand. Another reason I don't experience loneliness much is because I actually enjoy alone-time. I am an introvert. Many people are surprised when I tell them this, because I'm not shy and love meeting people, yet I'm an introvert in the sense that I recharge alone and have a need for lone-time. I think part of the reason I've been quite content not being married yet is because I really do enjoy my time alone.
So when a sudden bout of loneliness strikes, it is often a shocking sensation and it sometimes take me a while to figure out what it is I'm feeling. What I felt yesterday was a sense of loss and loneliness; something that the mere presence of people--just any ol' people--would not have been able to fill. I realized my longing for company yesterday when I headed off to go watch a movie. Unlike most people who cannot imagine going to the movies alone, I actually prefer watching movies alone. For me, watching a movie is not a social event. It is not as if we are going to the cinema to have a conversation. In fact, I often find watching movies with friends distracting. I really love watching movies, and sincerely go for the movie itself, and therefore watching a movie by myself is actually one of the things I enjoy doing. It is something I started to do from a very early age, and have always felt quite comfortable in doing so. Yet yesterday, I really did not want to go to the movies by myself--this then, was the cue for me that I'm having an "attack" of loneliness.
Nevertheless, I was on my way to see Iron Man 3 when a friend texted me to tell me of a small show of hers being played at an art festival. She is a theater director and often invites me to her shows. Not one to give up on free shows I quickly changed my plans from going to a cinema to going to an art festival.
While I enjoyed my friend's production, it was the dance performance afterwards that really did it for me. I've noted before how dance--bodies in motion--has an uplifting effect on me. One particular show I saw last year had an almost life-changing effect on me. The art festival yesterday (which continues the whole weekend) was just what the Doctor ordered. I reveled in the sounds and movements and images and could hardly sit still in my chair. I just wanted to jump up and move along with them. It was wonderful. Walking back to the subway station I saw beauty where ever I looked and took photos with my phone as far as I walked. Below are some of the photos I took. (The collage above is also something I made from the pictures I took yesterday.)
I can't say that my sense of loneliness has completely parted, but it is not as acrid as it was yesterday. In fact, it is a Saturday night and instead of going out I'm actually planning to stay in and relax, watching the final episode of the Lord of the Rings trilogy which I started re-watching two weeks ago. In any case, tomorrow will be a full day with people around me.
So when a sudden bout of loneliness strikes, it is often a shocking sensation and it sometimes take me a while to figure out what it is I'm feeling. What I felt yesterday was a sense of loss and loneliness; something that the mere presence of people--just any ol' people--would not have been able to fill. I realized my longing for company yesterday when I headed off to go watch a movie. Unlike most people who cannot imagine going to the movies alone, I actually prefer watching movies alone. For me, watching a movie is not a social event. It is not as if we are going to the cinema to have a conversation. In fact, I often find watching movies with friends distracting. I really love watching movies, and sincerely go for the movie itself, and therefore watching a movie by myself is actually one of the things I enjoy doing. It is something I started to do from a very early age, and have always felt quite comfortable in doing so. Yet yesterday, I really did not want to go to the movies by myself--this then, was the cue for me that I'm having an "attack" of loneliness.
Nevertheless, I was on my way to see Iron Man 3 when a friend texted me to tell me of a small show of hers being played at an art festival. She is a theater director and often invites me to her shows. Not one to give up on free shows I quickly changed my plans from going to a cinema to going to an art festival.
While I enjoyed my friend's production, it was the dance performance afterwards that really did it for me. I've noted before how dance--bodies in motion--has an uplifting effect on me. One particular show I saw last year had an almost life-changing effect on me. The art festival yesterday (which continues the whole weekend) was just what the Doctor ordered. I reveled in the sounds and movements and images and could hardly sit still in my chair. I just wanted to jump up and move along with them. It was wonderful. Walking back to the subway station I saw beauty where ever I looked and took photos with my phone as far as I walked. Below are some of the photos I took. (The collage above is also something I made from the pictures I took yesterday.)
I can't say that my sense of loneliness has completely parted, but it is not as acrid as it was yesterday. In fact, it is a Saturday night and instead of going out I'm actually planning to stay in and relax, watching the final episode of the Lord of the Rings trilogy which I started re-watching two weeks ago. In any case, tomorrow will be a full day with people around me.
 |
| "Korean Wave" |
 |
| "The Mermaid's Palace" |
 |
| "Phallus" |
 |
| "Muses" |
 |
| "Holding on to Dreams" |
 |
| "Pyramid" |
 |
| "Lovers" |
 |
| "Open Door Policy" |
 |
| "The Green Witch and Her Apprentice" |
 |
| "Fireworks" |
Friday, 26 April 2013
Two Bags
I bought two bags recently.
The one I bought at a flea market -- the Seoul Folk Flea Market, to be exact. An old second-hand leather bag. It is not very big -- big enough for a book or two and my cellphone. Just the right size for when I don't feel like carrying anything heavy, but also don't want to put things in my pant pockets. It actually has two long bands, so it functions as a small backpack. Somebody told me it looks a bit girlish (I guess because of the size), but I love it.
The one I bought at a flea market -- the Seoul Folk Flea Market, to be exact. An old second-hand leather bag. It is not very big -- big enough for a book or two and my cellphone. Just the right size for when I don't feel like carrying anything heavy, but also don't want to put things in my pant pockets. It actually has two long bands, so it functions as a small backpack. Somebody told me it looks a bit girlish (I guess because of the size), but I love it.
The other bag I bought online as a pouch for my laptop. Since I bought my laptop only a few months ago it has already gotten some scratches on its body from carrying it in my regular backpack together with all the other things I have in there, so I started hunting for something appropriate. In an Apple Store I saw something that I really liked -- a pouch for an 11" Macbook Air, but it cost around $80. A friend suggested I look online, which I did, and bought something similar for much cheaper. Honestly I didn't expect the quality to be as high as the bag I saw in the Apple Story, but I was pleasantly surprised. It was a great purchase.
Thursday, 25 April 2013
Cats & Dogs
Laura Miller, in her essay "Cat People vs. Dog People" provides the following succinct description of the points-of-view of Dog People vs. Cat People.
The rest of Miller's essay is also well worth reading. I wrote something similar--with my cat preference clearly spelled out--back in 2009 in Afrikaans.
Personally, although I have had and loved dogs, I am undeniably a cat person. It is indeed the fact that one has to earn a cat's love, that I like about them. In this regard a relationship with a cat is more on an equal plane, rather than a master-subject relationship as is the case with dogs. But actually, I just find cat's very beautiful. A part of it is that they are hunters, I think. Dogs, like jackal, are mostly scavengers. Yes, dogs do hunt, but when they do it is usually as part of a pack, which reminds me a bit of gangs. Cats, on the other hand, would find the idea of being part of a pack, a gang, a posse, quite distasteful--as do I. I'm guessing that is part of it, isn't it? I don't like groups and am not someone to succumb to peer pressure. With friends I prefer the depth of one-on-one encounters, rather than the superficiality of a party.
I found the following video quite hilarious.
Dog people profess to be baffled by the cat person's affection for an animal that provides so little active amusement: Cats will not frolic for you in the surf or fetch sticks or point with their noses at a bird for you to shoot. Because cats can't be trained to do the same sorts of tricks that dogs do, they are considered to be less intelligent, and paratively aloof or indifferent to humans. Dog people think cat people are suckers for doting on sneaky, selfish creatures that only pretend to like people in order to get food and other goodies and that will never, say, jump into a raging, flood-swollen river to rescue a small child at the risk of their own lives, as the faithful hound supposedly will.
Cat people heap contempt on dog people for actually thinking a dog's devotion counts for much. A dog's love for its owner is, cat people say, entirely instinctual, indiscriminate and often unearned by it''s object; you are not loved for yourself but for the position you assume in the dog's life--anyone else would do as well. Therefore, dog owners must be so desperate for love as to be nearly undeserving of it. The willingness of dogs to learn tricks is a result not of their intelligence but of their dopey eagerness to please. That cats can't be bothered to sit or heel on command is, their partisans insist, a sign that they are more clever by half. Cats are also self-cleaning, slobber-free, hand when you've got a mouse problem and on't have to be walked.
The rest of Miller's essay is also well worth reading. I wrote something similar--with my cat preference clearly spelled out--back in 2009 in Afrikaans.
Personally, although I have had and loved dogs, I am undeniably a cat person. It is indeed the fact that one has to earn a cat's love, that I like about them. In this regard a relationship with a cat is more on an equal plane, rather than a master-subject relationship as is the case with dogs. But actually, I just find cat's very beautiful. A part of it is that they are hunters, I think. Dogs, like jackal, are mostly scavengers. Yes, dogs do hunt, but when they do it is usually as part of a pack, which reminds me a bit of gangs. Cats, on the other hand, would find the idea of being part of a pack, a gang, a posse, quite distasteful--as do I. I'm guessing that is part of it, isn't it? I don't like groups and am not someone to succumb to peer pressure. With friends I prefer the depth of one-on-one encounters, rather than the superficiality of a party.
I found the following video quite hilarious.
Friday, 19 April 2013
About Women's Beauty and the Absence of Manhood
Dove has a new video that is going viral at the moment. It is about women's flawed self-perceptions and how they tend to perceive themselves in a negative light in comparison to how other's see them.
I liked the video -- but then the person who sent it to me, also sent me a link to a blogger's analysis of the video. The blogger made some piercing observations and highlighted a big problem with modern expectations of beauty. I highly recommend you watch the video and read the blogger's post.
The post made me think of one of my favourite essays which I do in one of my classes every year. It is by Susan Sontag and about the problem of beauty--how it is both a power source for women, but also a way of negating power from women--a way to always make them the fairer, and by implication, the weaker sex. Anyone interested in gender equality and parents concerned about the values they teach their daughters will find value in reading Sontag's "Women's Beauty: Put-Down or Power Source?" (No copyright infringement is intended with the sharing of this link.)
This then made me think of something else I read recently regarding men. While women in the modern Western world have seized the gender equality they deserve, men have in a sense abdicated their role as men. Young men, it seems, get stuck in a state of pre-adulthood: neither adolescent, nor adult; unwilling to grow up and take up the responsibilities of manhood, leaving the question: "Where Have All the Good Men Gone?" The article is a very interesting read.
I think part of the problem is the lack of fathers, mentors, and role-models. In years gone by, sons used to learn a family trade. This close working relationship between father and son was a way to nurture the boy into adulthood. "Masculinity is bestowed," as John Eldredge so famously said in his book Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul. A boy becomes a man through the guidance of his father (or a father figure). The problem is, however, that father's are generally absent; they may be workaholics--as my father was--or just plain missing, and the boy has to stumble his way towards adulthood without the guidance he needs. Sure he becomes an adult, but does he truly become a man? I wrote about my personal journey in adulthood and manhood some years back. It is still a topic I find fascinating.
I've watched the first season of Kitchen Nightmares recently and a common theme that I noticed was how these men (often the problems in the restaurants featured in the series involved a man not manning up to responsibility) really just needed someone who can tell him to get his act together, but also tell him that he has faith in him, that he can make it. In other words, these men just needed an involved and encouraging father (-figure). I wonder how much of the world's problems are centered in this very issue: absent, uninvolved fathers?
Even though there is still room for progress, there have been many good changes towards gender equality. At the same time, however, the genders have also lost much of their innate respective value, and it seems to be at a cost.
I liked the video -- but then the person who sent it to me, also sent me a link to a blogger's analysis of the video. The blogger made some piercing observations and highlighted a big problem with modern expectations of beauty. I highly recommend you watch the video and read the blogger's post.
The post made me think of one of my favourite essays which I do in one of my classes every year. It is by Susan Sontag and about the problem of beauty--how it is both a power source for women, but also a way of negating power from women--a way to always make them the fairer, and by implication, the weaker sex. Anyone interested in gender equality and parents concerned about the values they teach their daughters will find value in reading Sontag's "Women's Beauty: Put-Down or Power Source?" (No copyright infringement is intended with the sharing of this link.)
This then made me think of something else I read recently regarding men. While women in the modern Western world have seized the gender equality they deserve, men have in a sense abdicated their role as men. Young men, it seems, get stuck in a state of pre-adulthood: neither adolescent, nor adult; unwilling to grow up and take up the responsibilities of manhood, leaving the question: "Where Have All the Good Men Gone?" The article is a very interesting read.
I think part of the problem is the lack of fathers, mentors, and role-models. In years gone by, sons used to learn a family trade. This close working relationship between father and son was a way to nurture the boy into adulthood. "Masculinity is bestowed," as John Eldredge so famously said in his book Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul. A boy becomes a man through the guidance of his father (or a father figure). The problem is, however, that father's are generally absent; they may be workaholics--as my father was--or just plain missing, and the boy has to stumble his way towards adulthood without the guidance he needs. Sure he becomes an adult, but does he truly become a man? I wrote about my personal journey in adulthood and manhood some years back. It is still a topic I find fascinating.
I've watched the first season of Kitchen Nightmares recently and a common theme that I noticed was how these men (often the problems in the restaurants featured in the series involved a man not manning up to responsibility) really just needed someone who can tell him to get his act together, but also tell him that he has faith in him, that he can make it. In other words, these men just needed an involved and encouraging father (-figure). I wonder how much of the world's problems are centered in this very issue: absent, uninvolved fathers?
Even though there is still room for progress, there have been many good changes towards gender equality. At the same time, however, the genders have also lost much of their innate respective value, and it seems to be at a cost.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)